A Life Update, Imposter Syndrome, and Leaving Activism
rebekahberndt.substack.com
As I’ve begun to write more, I figured it was time to give you a little update about where I am and what I’m up to right now, particularly in regards to my writing and my offerings. Writing Last summer during my time in the UK I was writing and sharing about my experiences on Instagram and Facebook, particularly with regard to the land, the history, my own ancestral connection, and the spiritual streams weaving them all together. During that time I received the seed idea for a book— kind of a geo-spiritual history of Britain— and was asked the question, am I willing to commit myself to doing the work it will take to write it?
I relate so much to everything you shared. It is helpful to hear of women that I look up to also struggling with imposter syndrome. It is helpful to remember that we are not alone in that experience and that in fact, experiencing might even make what we have to say even more important. I look forward to reading more from you.
It’s good that you’re writing again. It’s probably a bit selfish that I enjoy it so much (or is that just usually the case when we enjoy something hmm) because much of what you are writing is similar to things I’m attempting to work through or know I need to work through.
I’m also wanting to get into some writing, but starting from a very different point from what I think I’ll end up doing. Seemingly unrelated I keep thinking I should take voice lessons, I sing well enough but am self taught and have been thinking lessons would help me a lot but never considered the throat chakra, I’m only vaguely familiar with chakras, and I didn’t consider the usefulness of voice training being connected to releasing the writing voice also.
I suppose one of the things I appreciate your writing is that it often helps shed some light on my own path and there are not many people I have encountered who do that. I’m very grateful for that.
And even if it doesn’t feel personally relevant I always sense there is deep wisdom in what you share.
There’s a few other synchronicities in what you wrote this time.
I’ll just say it strikes me you are maybe the one person I know who is in a very similar place to me even in how you still say you’re a practicing Christian but your spiritual practice is so much more expansive than what that usually entails. I can think of like 1 other person I know who might be similar to me in that regard also and I only met them cause of your online community. So I have a lot to be grateful to you for.
Looking forward to hearing more about how things go, reading more of your writing.
Oh and I really came here intending to comment on the imposter syndrome haha. Um yes, lots of thoughts about that. For now I’ll say I’ve found it interesting how certain groups think it’s only their group that feels it so intensely. Online I happen to be around a lot of software developers these days and there’s lots of talk as if it’s a tech phenomenon and I’m just thinking, no really it happens everywhere.
Nice to hear your voice again, sis! Lots of resonance of course. It's funny to hear you naming the vagueness re: activist culture. I just gave a lecture on 'cult dynamics' in not-obviously cult locations; and realized I was speaking mostly in generalities--that I'm still processing and not quite willing/able to be specific. I love your storytelling from Christian history, and also your down-to-earth tarot teachings.
I do love your perspective, Rebekah! I am still curious about your psychic reaction to Stonehenge (did you write that up and did I miss it?) … but mostly I love that you are stepping out as an authority in the things God has woven in to your being. Women are told they should be the cheerleaders and the mothers of greatness, not the heroes or preachers or speakers or writers. So we do have imposters syndrome … and we also undermine each other by thinking that we cannot be taught or led or healed by each other without going back to the fan-girl posture we have struggled to get out of our own heads.
I most love hearing your intuition and experience of that whole world that is “fiction” to most people but lived experience to some of us … real encounters and knowledge of the ancestors and the saints … new ways of understanding life and death … new joy in perceiving the world we walk in.
I relate so much to everything you shared. It is helpful to hear of women that I look up to also struggling with imposter syndrome. It is helpful to remember that we are not alone in that experience and that in fact, experiencing might even make what we have to say even more important. I look forward to reading more from you.
It’s good that you’re writing again. It’s probably a bit selfish that I enjoy it so much (or is that just usually the case when we enjoy something hmm) because much of what you are writing is similar to things I’m attempting to work through or know I need to work through.
I’m also wanting to get into some writing, but starting from a very different point from what I think I’ll end up doing. Seemingly unrelated I keep thinking I should take voice lessons, I sing well enough but am self taught and have been thinking lessons would help me a lot but never considered the throat chakra, I’m only vaguely familiar with chakras, and I didn’t consider the usefulness of voice training being connected to releasing the writing voice also.
I suppose one of the things I appreciate your writing is that it often helps shed some light on my own path and there are not many people I have encountered who do that. I’m very grateful for that.
And even if it doesn’t feel personally relevant I always sense there is deep wisdom in what you share.
There’s a few other synchronicities in what you wrote this time.
I’ll just say it strikes me you are maybe the one person I know who is in a very similar place to me even in how you still say you’re a practicing Christian but your spiritual practice is so much more expansive than what that usually entails. I can think of like 1 other person I know who might be similar to me in that regard also and I only met them cause of your online community. So I have a lot to be grateful to you for.
Looking forward to hearing more about how things go, reading more of your writing.
Oh and I really came here intending to comment on the imposter syndrome haha. Um yes, lots of thoughts about that. For now I’ll say I’ve found it interesting how certain groups think it’s only their group that feels it so intensely. Online I happen to be around a lot of software developers these days and there’s lots of talk as if it’s a tech phenomenon and I’m just thinking, no really it happens everywhere.
Nice to hear your voice again, sis! Lots of resonance of course. It's funny to hear you naming the vagueness re: activist culture. I just gave a lecture on 'cult dynamics' in not-obviously cult locations; and realized I was speaking mostly in generalities--that I'm still processing and not quite willing/able to be specific. I love your storytelling from Christian history, and also your down-to-earth tarot teachings.
I do love your perspective, Rebekah! I am still curious about your psychic reaction to Stonehenge (did you write that up and did I miss it?) … but mostly I love that you are stepping out as an authority in the things God has woven in to your being. Women are told they should be the cheerleaders and the mothers of greatness, not the heroes or preachers or speakers or writers. So we do have imposters syndrome … and we also undermine each other by thinking that we cannot be taught or led or healed by each other without going back to the fan-girl posture we have struggled to get out of our own heads.
I most love hearing your intuition and experience of that whole world that is “fiction” to most people but lived experience to some of us … real encounters and knowledge of the ancestors and the saints … new ways of understanding life and death … new joy in perceiving the world we walk in.